Bernie Sanders is Running for President, and the Establishment Just Sh!t Its Pants!

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You’ve heard of the shot heard round the world?

 

Well yesterday we had its fecal equivalent!

 

When Bernie Sanders said he was running for President for a second time, establishment hacks on the left and right had to make a run for the bathroom.

 

And after a single day of the Sanders campaign in which it raised almost $6 million of small donations from everyday folks, neoliberals and neofascists of every stripe are a little bit lighter this morning – a little less…. full.

 

Take our bullshitter in chief.

 

Donald Trump loves to squeeze out twitter storms in the early morning hours – presumably while sitting on his White House thrown.

 

This morning, he was moved to thumb out the following:

 

“Crazy Bernie has just entered the race. I wish him well!”

 

Like Hell you do, you arrogant xenophobic windbag!

 

Bernie is running for President – the best candidate situated to take you down.

 

He’s anti-establishment. A populist. And stands for the opposite of everything you’ve built your rocky neoconfederate administration on.

 

You wish him well! HA!

 

Trump is the most transparently fake candidate in history. You know exactly what he’s thinking because you know he always lies.

 

When ex-Starbucks CEO Howard Schultz threatened to run as an independent and thereby split the Democratic vote, Trump was overjoyed! So much so that he tried – emphasis on the TRY – to use reverse psychology on Schultz.

 

He tweeted:

 

“Howard Schultz doesn’t have the ‘guts’ to run for President! Watched him on @60Minutes last night and I agree with him that he is not the ‘smartest person.’

 

And then he told a televised audience exactly what he was doing – that he was trying to goad Schultz into running!

 

That’s not how reverse psychology works, Donald.

 

And now with his “Crazy Bernie” tweet this “very stable genius” wants us to believe he’s happy about that electoral matchup.

 

The dude better put on a metaphorical diaper.

 

He is done.
More than all the investigations and media condemnations, Sanders entering the race puts a hard line on when this national nightmare will be over – Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2020 – Election Day.

 

Barring some sort of extended Constitutional crisis where Republicans suspend voting or the Democrats try some clumsy coup that they’re much less equipped to accomplish this time around, Bernie is set up to win the Democratic primary and then the White House.

 

The biggest opponent Bernie has is himself. If he suddenly changes his policy positions or admits to being a secret knight of the KKK, he’d be in trouble. Otherwise, he has the best chance – still – to take down the reality show clown sitting in the Oval Office.

 

Sadly, it wasn’t just neocons who soiled their drawers yesterday.

 

The corporate Dems were cursed with the political squirts as well.

 

Many folks who were angry about Hillary Clinton’s loss in 2016 still blame Bernie. How dare he be more popular than the billionaire insider we thought would beat their billionaire insider!

 

For others, it was the bile of identity politics getting stuck in their throats. People who think a persons gender or skin color or sexual orientation is the main thing to look for in a political candidate – not their actual policy positions.

 

Frankly, I feel more sympathy for them than the others. They honestly want policy that will benefit everyone – but especially the most at risk. They’re just wrong to think that character traits are the essential mark of authenticity.

 

Barack Obama was our first black President. Yet he didn’t do so much to make the lives of black people better.

 

Sure he made them feel better. He made us all feel better about the endless possibilities in store. But when it was time to pass laws, enact policy, he sided with Wall Street over everyday Americans of every type.

 

But okay. I understand why you don’t want yet another old white male in the White House.

 

However, Bernie isn’t your typical white male. He’s Jewish. He may be too white for you, but he’s not white enough for the tiki torch crowd who chanted in Charlottesville “Jew will not replace us!” He’s not white enough for the pale neo-Nazi terrorist who shot up a Pittsburgh synagogue.

 

If you’re ready to ignore that, check your own intersectional privilege.

 

And speaking of that, can we retire the propaganda nonsense label of the Bernie Bros? Attempts to erase women and minority Bernie supporters are not progressive. They’re the exact opposite of what we’re fighting for.

 

Heck! Sanders has more support among blacks, Latinos and women than he does among white men!

 

The time has come for a change.

 

It’s well past that time.

 

Bernie Sanders campaign is part of that.

 

It marks the end of capitalism run amok. It marks the end of colorblind national policy. It marks the end of ignoring the environmental crisis.

 

What it marks the beginning of … that depends on all of us.


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3 thoughts on “Bernie Sanders is Running for President, and the Establishment Just Sh!t Its Pants!

  1. “More than all the investigations and media condemnations, Sanders entering the race puts a hard line on when this national nightmare will be over – Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2020 – Election Day.”

    Ah, no: January 20, 2021.

    Like

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